Xbox 360 Repairs - a Tragedy in 12 Parts
As some of you may be aware, I do most of my video gaming on an Xbox 360. I really enjoy the thing - good games, nice graphics, not a computer. Good overall. But a month ago, I was struck by the dreaded Delamination of Yon Graphics Card Wiring, Demanding Repair Forthwith. So I filed for repairs on my 360 right after Labor Day (and after I completed Bioshock). I filed online, so I had to register the console using the S/N from the back of the unit. When I registered the unit, there were no problems - tied to my Live ID, and we're good. M$ sent me my box and I fired it off straight away. I get a few notes preceeding the sending of the unit including the S/N. So far so good.
On 9/17 I get a "received by Xbox Service Center" email, with no S/N attached. Huh (WTF moment #1). On 9/24, I'm getting antsy for Halo 3 so I go to the service site to check up, just like the email tells me to do. Log in, and it tells me I don't have a device registered with M$ (WTF moment #2). I try adding the S/N to my Live ID again, just as I had done when I put in for the repairs, and I get an error that I need to call Xbox customer support.
So I call support. Maxx (double X's for DOUBLE EXTREMENESS) the automated "call center specialist" puts me through to the only people who seem to be able to help me, accounts and customer service. I talk with a nice lady there, who takes my personal information twice (WTF moment #3) to confirm my ID, then tells me she can't help me and that I'm supposed to talk to repairs and hardware, which of course is not a listed option (WTF moment #4). So I'm sent overseas to an Indian call center where a guy feigning an American identity (WTF moment #5) handles my call. I give him all my information 3 more times (WTF moment #7) then we start down the next 80 minutes of my life (WTF moment #8).
I explain the situation - I just want to know when I should receive my Xbox back from the center; if it's an error with the site, I just want to get things corrected. After giving him my case ID and serial number again (WTF moment #10), he tells me he's going to put me on hold for 3 minutes - then again for 3 minutes, which stretches to 10, then another 10 minutes, which stretches to 15 (WTF moment #11). He comes back and tells me that my console was received on 9/24. I tell him the information I have in the confirmation email says it was received on 9/17 and there's no way I should receive that email if the Xbox hadn't even arrived yet (WTF moment #12). He "clarifies" to tell me it was sent on 9/21 and arrived 9/24, to which I say, no, it was sent on 9/6 and received on 9/17 (WTF moment #13). I am then put on hold another 10 minutes (WTF moment #14).
After he returns to the phone, he takes my information yet again (WTF moment #15), during which time I have to explain that Alex is actually short for Alexander (WTF moment #16) then tells me my console has been delivered and signed for (WTF moment #17). The name, of course, does not match the information I gave him. Who signed for it, I ask? He says a name that sounds like "Felix Dahore." OK, I ask, what address was it delivered to - thinking foolishly that this was simply a case of mail fraud here in town. He tells me the address is in **Mexico** (WTF moment #18).
Stunned, I ask him what Microsoft is going to do about it. He tells me I need to file a police report ((WTF moment #19). Why?, I ask - if its in Mexico local cops can't do crap about it. Maybe you want that I report Microsoft for stealing from me instead (WTF moment #20)? He is obviously and painfully confused by my thinly veiled threat. He then leaves me on hold another 10 minutes (WTF moment #21), and comes back to tell me that he's done what he can, that my case is in "expidited status" and that I need to call back in 2 days (WTF moment #22). I tell him I need someone to contact *me* back, at which point he leaves me on hold another 5 minutes (WTF moment #23), asks for my personal information again (WTF moment #24), then tells me the call center has no availabilty to call me back (WTF moment #25). At this point, he seems to think he's done (WTF moment #26), but I'm not letting him off the hook this easy.
So what about my registration number, I ask, you know, the original reason I called (WTF moment #27)? He puts me on hold 3 more minutes (WTF moment #28), then tells me that that S/N is not tied to my Live account. No shit, sherlock (WTF moment #29). I ask what the hell happend to my registration then? He tells me I never registered a device (WTF moment #30). I then proceed to explain to him how both the Xbox service process (WTF moment #31) and databases (WTF moment #32) work - that I cannot register for repairs without an S/N, and that if the S/N was registered elsewhere, I should have gotten an error. He tells me, that in fact, that S/N IS registered, but it's with a guy who has 2 consoles (WTF moment #32). I ask him if there's a possibility that guy actually got MY registration, and lay out the timeline again of the issue - that the S/N was MINE until the last email, so the chances of it being his are only really feasible if it's a case of internal
fraud or a database error. I ask him out of pure desperation if the registrant is also the recipient of my device. He says no - so, either way, they STILL sent it to the wrong place (WTF moment #33).
After taking my information yet again (WTF moment #34), he tells me I should double check the S/N I used. Excuse me, but...HOW in the HELL is that supposed to happen when you sent my console to MEXICO?!? (WTF moment #35). He tells me to find my receipt, and take it to the retailer I purchased from, and have them pull the S/N from there (WTF moment #36). Of course, this still doesn't correct the larger issue of the device I DID register not appearing on my account, but who's counting at this point? I posit that maybe they changed the S/N if they sent me an entirely new console? Of course, he had no idea if that would be a possibility (WTF moment #37).
Finally, we get back to the situation of what M$ needs to do to rectify my situation, which is very simple - send me a new Xbox, write the old one off as a loss, apologize for the mix up. He tells me there's a chance the Xbox is moving THROUGH Mexico to my home (WTF moment #38) because the database the agents use does not get the same data that flows through the website (WTF moment #39), so the best thing i can do is call back in a few days to check (WTF moment #40) and watch my email. Exasperated, I agree.
You won this round, Microsoft. I swear to god, though, if I end up getting my console beat to shit by USPS, shipped back and forth across the border, or worst of all, broken...I will personally drive to Renton, find the head of Xbox customer service, tear off his head, take a huge steaming crap down his neck stump, and piss on the corpse. It's only 3 hours away, and I can probably make it before the crime would count as premeditated.
Pray for me - and for all of Microsoft - on Wednesday.
As some of you may be aware, I do most of my video gaming on an Xbox 360. I really enjoy the thing - good games, nice graphics, not a computer. Good overall. But a month ago, I was struck by the dreaded Delamination of Yon Graphics Card Wiring, Demanding Repair Forthwith. So I filed for repairs on my 360 right after Labor Day (and after I completed Bioshock). I filed online, so I had to register the console using the S/N from the back of the unit. When I registered the unit, there were no problems - tied to my Live ID, and we're good. M$ sent me my box and I fired it off straight away. I get a few notes preceeding the sending of the unit including the S/N. So far so good.
On 9/17 I get a "received by Xbox Service Center" email, with no S/N attached. Huh (WTF moment #1). On 9/24, I'm getting antsy for Halo 3 so I go to the service site to check up, just like the email tells me to do. Log in, and it tells me I don't have a device registered with M$ (WTF moment #2). I try adding the S/N to my Live ID again, just as I had done when I put in for the repairs, and I get an error that I need to call Xbox customer support.
So I call support. Maxx (double X's for DOUBLE EXTREMENESS) the automated "call center specialist" puts me through to the only people who seem to be able to help me, accounts and customer service. I talk with a nice lady there, who takes my personal information twice (WTF moment #3) to confirm my ID, then tells me she can't help me and that I'm supposed to talk to repairs and hardware, which of course is not a listed option (WTF moment #4). So I'm sent overseas to an Indian call center where a guy feigning an American identity (WTF moment #5) handles my call. I give him all my information 3 more times (WTF moment #7) then we start down the next 80 minutes of my life (WTF moment #8).
I explain the situation - I just want to know when I should receive my Xbox back from the center; if it's an error with the site, I just want to get things corrected. After giving him my case ID and serial number again (WTF moment #10), he tells me he's going to put me on hold for 3 minutes - then again for 3 minutes, which stretches to 10, then another 10 minutes, which stretches to 15 (WTF moment #11). He comes back and tells me that my console was received on 9/24. I tell him the information I have in the confirmation email says it was received on 9/17 and there's no way I should receive that email if the Xbox hadn't even arrived yet (WTF moment #12). He "clarifies" to tell me it was sent on 9/21 and arrived 9/24, to which I say, no, it was sent on 9/6 and received on 9/17 (WTF moment #13). I am then put on hold another 10 minutes (WTF moment #14).
After he returns to the phone, he takes my information yet again (WTF moment #15), during which time I have to explain that Alex is actually short for Alexander (WTF moment #16) then tells me my console has been delivered and signed for (WTF moment #17). The name, of course, does not match the information I gave him. Who signed for it, I ask? He says a name that sounds like "Felix Dahore." OK, I ask, what address was it delivered to - thinking foolishly that this was simply a case of mail fraud here in town. He tells me the address is in **Mexico** (WTF moment #18).
Stunned, I ask him what Microsoft is going to do about it. He tells me I need to file a police report ((WTF moment #19). Why?, I ask - if its in Mexico local cops can't do crap about it. Maybe you want that I report Microsoft for stealing from me instead (WTF moment #20)? He is obviously and painfully confused by my thinly veiled threat. He then leaves me on hold another 10 minutes (WTF moment #21), and comes back to tell me that he's done what he can, that my case is in "expidited status" and that I need to call back in 2 days (WTF moment #22). I tell him I need someone to contact *me* back, at which point he leaves me on hold another 5 minutes (WTF moment #23), asks for my personal information again (WTF moment #24), then tells me the call center has no availabilty to call me back (WTF moment #25). At this point, he seems to think he's done (WTF moment #26), but I'm not letting him off the hook this easy.
So what about my registration number, I ask, you know, the original reason I called (WTF moment #27)? He puts me on hold 3 more minutes (WTF moment #28), then tells me that that S/N is not tied to my Live account. No shit, sherlock (WTF moment #29). I ask what the hell happend to my registration then? He tells me I never registered a device (WTF moment #30). I then proceed to explain to him how both the Xbox service process (WTF moment #31) and databases (WTF moment #32) work - that I cannot register for repairs without an S/N, and that if the S/N was registered elsewhere, I should have gotten an error. He tells me, that in fact, that S/N IS registered, but it's with a guy who has 2 consoles (WTF moment #32). I ask him if there's a possibility that guy actually got MY registration, and lay out the timeline again of the issue - that the S/N was MINE until the last email, so the chances of it being his are only really feasible if it's a case of internal
fraud or a database error. I ask him out of pure desperation if the registrant is also the recipient of my device. He says no - so, either way, they STILL sent it to the wrong place (WTF moment #33).
After taking my information yet again (WTF moment #34), he tells me I should double check the S/N I used. Excuse me, but...HOW in the HELL is that supposed to happen when you sent my console to MEXICO?!? (WTF moment #35). He tells me to find my receipt, and take it to the retailer I purchased from, and have them pull the S/N from there (WTF moment #36). Of course, this still doesn't correct the larger issue of the device I DID register not appearing on my account, but who's counting at this point? I posit that maybe they changed the S/N if they sent me an entirely new console? Of course, he had no idea if that would be a possibility (WTF moment #37).
Finally, we get back to the situation of what M$ needs to do to rectify my situation, which is very simple - send me a new Xbox, write the old one off as a loss, apologize for the mix up. He tells me there's a chance the Xbox is moving THROUGH Mexico to my home (WTF moment #38) because the database the agents use does not get the same data that flows through the website (WTF moment #39), so the best thing i can do is call back in a few days to check (WTF moment #40) and watch my email. Exasperated, I agree.
You won this round, Microsoft. I swear to god, though, if I end up getting my console beat to shit by USPS, shipped back and forth across the border, or worst of all, broken...I will personally drive to Renton, find the head of Xbox customer service, tear off his head, take a huge steaming crap down his neck stump, and piss on the corpse. It's only 3 hours away, and I can probably make it before the crime would count as premeditated.
Pray for me - and for all of Microsoft - on Wednesday.
Labels: customer service, rant, video games
